The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
he fucked my hip out of place.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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