if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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