Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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