Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize