wakey wakey hands off snakey
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize