shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
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