I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
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First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
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I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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