when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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