You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize