Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
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