I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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