Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I need water and some morals
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize