I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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