she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Is it because I queefed?
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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