I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
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