I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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