i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
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