just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
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