what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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