This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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