and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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