She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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