how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
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