is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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