this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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