Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize