im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
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