She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
How's work?
Spinning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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