Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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