dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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