So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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