Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
its not stalking. its research.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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