she's into porn, im staying here tonight
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
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