my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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