You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
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