Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize