I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize