btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize