Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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