Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize