Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Randomize