In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
where does the pee come out of this thing
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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