he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize