Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize