Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
wakey wakey hands off snakey
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
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