it hurts more in the daytime
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I had to cum in my sink.
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