This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
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