yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
You've changed since you got that strap on
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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