Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
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