Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
The uberlube is also flammable
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Randomize